Id\u00e9zetek angol nyelvtanul\u00e1shoz<\/h2>\n\n
A nyelvtanul\u00e1s id\u00e9zetekb\u0151l nagyszer\u0171 \u00f6tlet. Nem csak \u00e9rdekes, \u00e9s megtan\u00edt valami b\u00f6lcsess\u00e9gget, ugyanakkor egyidej\u0171leg asszimil\u00e1ljuk a nyelvtant \u00e9s a sz\u00f3kincset. Szinte csak el\u0151ny\u00f6k!<\/p>\n\n
Ez\u00e9rt ebben a bejegyz\u00e9sben angol nyelv\u0171 id\u00e9zetek k\u00f6z\u00fcl v\u00e1logathatsz:<\/p>\n\n
- Vicces id\u00e9zetek angol tanul\u00e1shoz<\/a><\/li>
- B\u00f6lcs angol id\u00e9zetek az \u00e9letr\u0151l.<\/a><\/li>
- Viccek saj\u00e1t magunkr\u00f3l.<\/a><\/li>
- Vicces angol id\u00e9zetek a bar\u00e1tokr\u00f3l.<\/a><\/li>
- Vicces id\u00e9zetek az iskol\u00e1r\u00f3l angolul.<\/a><\/li>
- Vicces id\u00e9zetek az angol tanul\u00e1shoz a munk\u00e1r\u00f3l \u00e9s a karrierr\u0151l.<\/a><\/li>
- Vicces angol id\u00e9zetek a csal\u00e1di \u00e9letr\u0151l.<\/a><\/li>
- Vicces id\u00e9zetek angolul a h\u00e1zass\u00e1gr\u00f3l.<\/a><\/li>
- Egy\u00e9b j\u00f3pofa \u00e9s tr\u00e9f\u00e1s id\u00e9zetekangol tanul\u00e1shoz.<\/a><\/li>
- Hogyan tanuljunk angolul, hogy meg\u00e9rts\u00fck az \u00f6sszes okos, \u00e9rdekes \u00e9s vicces id\u00e9zetet eredetiben?<\/a><\/li><\/ol>\n
1. Vicces id\u00e9zetek angol tanul\u00e1shoz<\/h2>\n\n
- I intend to live forever. So far, so good. Steven Wright<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
\u00d6r\u00f6kk\u00e9 akarok \u00e9lni. Eddig j\u00f3l megy.<\/p>\n\n
- Tomorrow is often the busiest day of the week. Spanish proverb<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
A holnap \u00e1ltal\u00e1ban a legforgalmasabb (figyelj a mell\u00e9kn\u00e9vragoz\u00e1sra<\/a> \u2192 busy \u2192 busier \u2192 the busiest<\/em> nap a h\u00e9ten.<\/a> Spanyol k\u00f6zmond\u00e1s.<\/p>\n\n
- The best way to teach your kids about taxes is by eating 30 percent of their ice cream. Bill Murray<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
A legjobb m\u00f3dja annak, hogy elmagyar\u00e9zd a gyerekeknek az ad\u00f3 fogalm\u00e1t, hogy megeszed a fagyijuk 30%-\u00e1t.<\/p>\n\n
- Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company. Mark Twain<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Menj a mennybe az \u00e9ghajlat\u00e9rt, a pokolba a t\u00e1rsas\u00e1g\u00e9rt.<\/p>\n\n
- If a book about failures doesn\u2019t sell, is it a success? Jerry Seinfeld<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Ha egy k\u00f6nyvet a kudarcokr\u00f3l nem adnak el, akkor vajon ez sikernek sz\u00e1m\u00edt?<\/p>\n\n
- Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off. Bill Murray<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
A tud\u00e1s olyan, mint az als\u00f3nem\u0171. J\u00f3, ha megvan, nem felt\u00e9tlen\u00fcl kell megmutatni.<\/p>\n\n
- A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on. Winston S. Churchill<\/a><\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
A hazugs\u00e1g bej\u00e1rja a f\u00e9l vil\u00e1got, miel\u0151tt az igazs\u00e1gnak es\u00e9lye lesz nadr\u00e1gba b\u00fajni\/bugyit venni.<\/a><\/p>\n\n
- Accept who you are. Unless you\u2019re a serial killer. Ellen DeGeneres<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Fogadd el, hogy ki vagy. Hacsak nem vagy sorozatgyilkos.<\/a><\/p>\n\n
- It\u2019s okay if you don\u2019t like me. Not everyone has good taste.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Nem baj, ha nem kedvelsz engem. Nem mindenkinek van j\u00f3 \u00edzl\u00e9se.<\/p>\n\n
- If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee. Abraham Lincoln<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Ha ez k\u00e1v\u00e9, k\u00e9rlek, hozz nekem te\u00e1t,<\/a> \u00e9s ha ez tea, akkor k\u00e9rlek, hozz nekem k\u00e1v\u00e9t ink\u00e1bb.<\/p>\n\n
- I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me. Fred Allen<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Szeretem a hossz\u00fa s\u00e9t\u00e1kat, k\u00fcl\u00f6n\u00f6sen, ha olyan emberek v\u00e1lasztj\u00e1k \u0151ket, akik ideges\u00edtenek.<\/p>\n\n
[Az eredetiben ez szenved\u0151 alakban van present simple passive<\/a>.]<\/em><\/p>\n\n
- The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits. Albert Einstein<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
A k\u00fcl\u00f6nbs\u00e9g a butas\u00e1g \u00e9s a zsenialit\u00e1s k\u00f6z\u00f6tt az, hogy a zseninek megvannak a maga korl\u00e1tai.<\/p>\n\n
- Don\u2019t be so humble \u2013 you are not that great. Golda Meir<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Ne l\u00e9gy ilyen szer\u00e9ny – nem vagy olyan nagyszer\u0171.<\/p>\n\n
![\"Olvasd](\"https:\/\/speakingo.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/nauka-calych-zdan-po-angielsku-sentences.jpg\")
Olvasd el ezt is: Van \u00e9rtelme eg\u00e9sz mondatokat tanulni angolul?<\/a><\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n 2. Vicces id\u00e9zetek az \u00e9letr\u0151l angolul<\/h2>\n\n
- Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth. Anonymous.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Az \u00e9let r\u00f6vid. Mosolyogj, am\u00edg m\u00e9g fogaid vannak.<\/a> n\u00e9vtelen.<\/p>\n\n
- Never miss a good chance to shut up. Will Rogers<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Soha ne pazarold el az es\u00e9lyt, hogy befogd a sz\u00e1d (hagyja abba a cseveg\u00e9st).<\/p>\n\n
- Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive. Elbert Hubbard<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Ne vedd t\u00fal komolyan az \u00e9letet. \u00dagysem \u00e9led t\u00fal.<\/p>\n\n
- All generalizations are false, including this one<\/a>. Mark Twain<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Minden \u00e1ltal\u00e1nos\u00edt\u00e1s hamis, bele\u00e9rtve ezt is.<\/p>\n\n
- A pessimist is a man who thinks everybody is as nasty as himself, and hates them for it. George Bernard Shaw<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
A pesszimista az az ember, aki azt hiszi, mindenki olyan gonosz, mint \u0151, \u00e9s gy\u0171l\u00f6li \u0151ket ez\u00e9rt.<\/p>\n\n
- If we\u2019re not meant to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Ha nem kellene nassolnunk az \u00e9jszaka k\u00f6zep\u00e9n, akkor minek van l\u00e1mpa a h\u0171t\u0151ben.<\/p>\n\n
- Everything happens for a reason. But sometimes the reason is that you\u2019re stupid and you make bad decisions.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Semmi sem t\u00f6rt\u00e9nik ok n\u00e9lk\u00fcl. De n\u00e9ha az az ok, hogy h\u00fclye vagy, \u00e9s rossz d\u00f6nt\u00e9seket hozol.<\/p>\n\n
- My life feels like a test I didn\u2019t study for.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Az \u00e9letem olyan, mint egy teszt, amire nem tanultam.<\/p>\n\n
![\"bölcs](\"https:\/\/speakingo.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/madre-cytaty-o-zyciu-po-angielsku.jpg\")
L\u00e1sd m\u00e9g: 34 b\u00f6lcs id\u00e9zet az \u00e9letr\u0151l angolul<\/a><\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n \u00a0<\/h2>\n\n
3. Viccek angolul magunkr\u00f3l<\/h2>\n\n
- I\u2019m not shy, I\u2019m holding back my awesomeness so I don\u2019t intimidate you.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Nem vagyok sz\u00e9gyenl\u0151s. Visszatartom a nagyszer\u0171s\u00e9gemet, hogy ne f\u00e9leml\u00edthesselek meg.<\/p>\n\n
- If you are lonely, dim all lights and put on a horror movie. After a while it won\u2019t feel like you are alone anymore.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Ha mag\u00e1nyosnak \u00e9rzed magad, kapcsold le a villanyt, \u00e9s tegy\u00e9l be valami horror filmet. Mindj\u00e1rt \u00fagy fogod \u00e9rezni, hogy nem vagy egyed\u00fcl.<\/p>\n\n
[L\u00e1sd m\u00e9g: Hogyan seg\u00edthetnek a zombik az angol szenved\u0151 szerkezet tanul\u00e1s\u00e1ban?<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n
- My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do. Unknown<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Az \u00e1gyam egy var\u00e1zslatos hely, ahol hirtelen eszembe jut minden, amit elfelejtettem megcsin\u00e1lni. (Szerz\u0151) ismeretlen<\/p>\n\n
- I went to a meeting for premature ejaculators. I left early. Benny J\u00e1nos<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Elmentem egy tal\u00e1lkoz\u00f3ra, amit korai mag\u00f6ml\u00e9sben szenved\u0151knek szerveztek. El\u00e9g kor\u00e1n elmentem\/a v\u00e9ge el\u0151tt elmentem.<\/p>\n\n
- Sometimes I want to go back in time and punch myself in the face.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
N\u00e9ha vissza akarom ford\u00edtani az<\/a> id\u0151t, \u00e9s arcon \u00fctni magam.<\/p>\n\n
- I am not lazy. I am on energy saving mode.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Nem vagyok lusta. Energiatakar\u00e9kos \u00fczemm\u00f3dban vagyok.<\/p>\n\n
- I just want my stomach to be as flat as my ass.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Csak azt akarom, hogy a hasam olyan lapos legyen, mint a seggem.<\/p>\n\n
- I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio. Rodney Dangerfield<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Tudtam, hogy a sz\u00fcleim ut\u00e1lnak. A f\u00fcrd\u0151j\u00e1t\u00e9kaim keny\u00e9rpir\u00edt\u00f3 \u00e9s r\u00e1di\u00f3 voltak.<\/p>\n\n
- I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people. Rodney Dangerfield<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
R\u00e1j\u00f6ttem, hogy van( f\u00fcgg\u0151 besz\u00e9d<\/a>) csak egy m\u00f3dja annak, hogy sov\u00e1nynak t\u0171njek: a k\u00f6v\u00e9r emberekkel kell l\u00f3gni.<\/p>\n\n
- I\u2019m writing a book. I\u2019ve got the page numbers done. Steven Wright<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Egy k\u00f6nyvet \u00edrok. M\u00e1r megsz\u00e1moztam az oldalakat.<\/p>\n\n
- I have always wanted to be somebody<\/a>, but I see now I should have been more specific. Liliom Tomlin<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Mindig is valaki akartam lenni, de most l\u00e1tom, hogy sz\u00fcks\u00e9g lett volna kicsivel konkr\u00e9tabbnak lenni (kifejezve ezt a k\u00edv\u00e1ns\u00e1got).<\/a><\/p>\n\n
- My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. Mitch Hedberg<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
A mesters\u00e9ges (hamis) n\u00f6v\u00e9nyeim az\u00e9rt haltak meg, mert nem tettem \u00fagy, mintha \u00f6nt\u00f6zn\u00e9m \u0151ket.<\/p>\n\n
- My esteem in this country has gone up substantially. It is very nice now that when people wave at me, they use all their fingers. Jimmy Carter (US president 1977 to 1981)<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
A tiszteletem ebben az orsz\u00e1gban \u00f3ri\u00e1si m\u00e9rt\u00e9kben megn\u0151tt. Nagyon j\u00f3, hogy most, amikor az emberek integetnek nekem, minden ujjukat haszn\u00e1lj\u00e1k.<\/p>\n\n
![\"Angol](\"https:\/\/speakingo.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/przeklenstwa-po-angielsku-wulgaryzmy.jpg\")
L\u00e1sd m\u00e9g: K\u00e1romkod\u00e1s \u00e9s vulgarizmus angolul.<\/a><\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n 4. Vicces id\u00e9zetek a bar\u00e1tokr\u00f3l angol tanul\u00e1shoz<\/h2>\n\n
- Love is blind; friendship tries not to notice. Otto von Bismarck<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
A szerelem <\/a>vak; a bar\u00e1ts\u00e1g megpr\u00f3b\u00e1lja <\/a>nem \u00e9szrevenni.<\/p>\n\n
- As your best friend I\u2019ll always pick you up when you fall, after I finish laughing.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Mint a legjobb bar\u00e1tod, mindig felseg\u00edtelek, ha elesn\u00e9l, miut\u00e1n abbahagytam a nevet\u00e9st.<\/p>\n\n
- Some people are like clouds. When they disappear, it\u2019s a beautiful day.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Vannak, akik olyanok, mint a felh\u0151k. Amikor elt\u0171nnek, szebb lesz a napod.<\/p>\n\n
- Please cancel my subscriptions to your issues.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
K\u00e9rlek, t\u00f6r\u00f6ld az el\u0151fizet\u00e9sem a probl\u00e9m\u00e1idra.<\/p>\n\n
- I\u2019m not arguing. I\u2019m simply explaining why I\u2019m right.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Nem vitatkozom. Csak elmagyar\u00e1zom, mi\u00e9rt van igazam.<\/p>\n\n
- If you\u2019re going to do something tonight that you\u2019ll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late. Henny Youngman<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Ha olyat tenn\u00e9l ma este, amit holnap reggel megb\u00e1nn\u00e1l, akkor aludj r\u00e1 egyet.<\/p>\n\n
- There is nothing better than a friend, unless it is a friend with chocolate. Linda Grayson<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Semmi sem jobb, mint egy bar\u00e1t, kiv\u00e9ve egy bar\u00e1t csokol\u00e1d\u00e9val.<\/p>\n\n
- Only your real friends will tell you when your face is dirty. Sicilian Proverb<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Csak az igazi bar\u00e1tok mondj\u00e1k meg, ha piszkos az arcod. Szic\u00edliai mond\u00e1s.<\/p>\n\n
- When you\u2019re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, \u2018Damn, that was fun\u2019. Groucho Marx<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Amikor b\u00f6rt\u00f6nben vagy, egy j\u00f3 bar\u00e1t megpr\u00f3b\u00e1lja letenni az \u00f3vad\u00e9kot. A legjobb bar\u00e1t a cell\u00e1ban fog \u00fclni melletted, \u00e9s azt mondja: „Ej, de j\u00f3 m\u00f3ka volt!”<\/p>\n\n
![\"barátsággal](\"https:\/\/speakingo.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/cytaty-o-przyjazni-po-angielsku-1.jpg\")
L\u00e1sd m\u00e9g: 43 legszebb id\u00e9zet a bar\u00e1ts\u00e1gr\u00f3l angolul.<\/a><\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n \u00a0<\/h2>\n\n
5. Vicces id\u00e9zetek az iskol\u00e1r\u00f3l angolul<\/h2>\n\n
- I spent 113 880 hours of my life for a paper and a handshake.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
113.880 \u00f3r\u00e1t t\u00f6lt\u00f6ttem az \u00e9letemb\u0151l egy pap\u00edr\u00e9rt \u00e9s k\u00e9zfog\u00e1s\u00e9rt.<\/p>\n\n
- Education is what remains after one has forgotten what one has learned in school. Albert Einstein<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Az oktat\u00e1s az, ami azut\u00e1n marad, hogy valaki elfelejti, amit az iskol\u00e1ban tanult.<\/p>\n\n
- All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height. Casey Stengel<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Ok\u00e9, mindannyian bet\u0171rendben sorakozzatok fel a legalacsonyabbt\u00f3l a legmagasabbig.<\/p>\n\n
- In school, you\u2019re taught a lesson and then given a test. In life, you\u2019re given a test that teaches you a lesson. Bodett Zolt\u00e1n<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Az iskol\u00e1ban tanulsz, azt\u00e1n kapsz egy tesztet. Az \u00e9letben kapsz egy tesztet, ami tanuls\u00e1g a sz\u00e1modra.<\/p>\n\n
- It is impossible for a man to learn what he thinks he already knows. Epictetus<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Lehetetlen, hogy egy szem\u00e9ly megtanuljon valamit, amir\u0151l azt hiszi, hogy m\u00e1r tudja.<\/p>\n\n
- Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance. Will Durant<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Az oktat\u00e1s a saj\u00e1t tudatlans\u00e1g \u00e1lland\u00f3 felfedez\u00e9se.<\/p>\n\n
- School is learning things you don\u2019t want to know, surrounded by people you wish you didn\u2019t know, while working toward a future you don\u2019t know will ever come. Dave Kell<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Az iskola olyan dolgokat tan\u00edt, amiket nem akarsz tudni, olyan emberekkel k\u00f6r\u00fclv\u00e9ve, akiket nem akarsz ismerni, mik\u00f6zben egy olyan j\u00f6v\u0151\u00e9rt dolgozol, amir\u0151l nem tudod, hogy valaha elj\u00f6n-e.<\/p>\n\n
- The most important thing we learn at school is the fact that the most important things can\u2019t be learned at school. Haruki Murakami<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
A legfontosabb dolog, amit az iskol\u00e1ban megtanulunk, hogy a legfontosabb dolgokat nem lehet megtanulni az iskol\u00e1ban.<\/p>\n\n
![\"viccek,](\"https:\/\/speakingo.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/12\/dowcipy-o-jasiu-po-angielsku-szkola.jpg\")
L\u00e1sd m\u00e9g: M\u00f3ricka az iskol\u00e1ban [Megjegyz\u00e9s: Sz\u00f3viccek]<\/a><\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n \u00a0<\/h2>\n\n
6. Vicces id\u00e9zetek a munk\u00e1r\u00f3l \u00e9s a karrierr\u0151l angolul<\/h2>\n\n
- My career plans were much more exciting when I was 5.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
A karrierterveim sokkal \u00e9rdekesebbek voltak \u00f6t \u00e9ves koromban.<\/p>\n\n
- A boss on vacation is the most cost effective measure. Everybody in the office has a vacation at the cost of one. Thibaut<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
A f\u0151n\u00f6k nyaral\u00e1sa a legjobban elk\u00f6lt\u00f6tt p\u00e9nz. Az irod\u00e1ban mindenki nyaral egy \u00e1r\u00e1\u00e9rt.<\/p>\n\n
- There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full. Kissinger Henrik<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
Egy h\u00e9ten bel\u00fcl lehet a v\u00e1ls\u00e1g. Az id\u0151beoszt\u00e1som m\u00e1r tele van.<\/p>\n\n
- Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit. George Carlin<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
A legt\u00f6bb ember csak annyira kem\u00e9nyen dolgozik, hogy ne r\u00fagj\u00e1k ki, \u00e9s csak annyira kap el\u00e9g p\u00e9nzt, hogy ne l\u00e9pjen ki.<\/p>\n\n
- Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society. Mark Twain<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit. George Carlin<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full. Kissinger Henrik<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- A boss on vacation is the most cost effective measure. Everybody in the office has a vacation at the cost of one. Thibaut<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- My career plans were much more exciting when I was 5.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- The most important thing we learn at school is the fact that the most important things can\u2019t be learned at school. Haruki Murakami<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- School is learning things you don\u2019t want to know, surrounded by people you wish you didn\u2019t know, while working toward a future you don\u2019t know will ever come. Dave Kell<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance. Will Durant<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- It is impossible for a man to learn what he thinks he already knows. Epictetus<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- In school, you\u2019re taught a lesson and then given a test. In life, you\u2019re given a test that teaches you a lesson. Bodett Zolt\u00e1n<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height. Casey Stengel<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- Education is what remains after one has forgotten what one has learned in school. Albert Einstein<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- I spent 113 880 hours of my life for a paper and a handshake.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- When you\u2019re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, \u2018Damn, that was fun\u2019. Groucho Marx<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- Only your real friends will tell you when your face is dirty. Sicilian Proverb<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- There is nothing better than a friend, unless it is a friend with chocolate. Linda Grayson<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- If you\u2019re going to do something tonight that you\u2019ll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late. Henny Youngman<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- I\u2019m not arguing. I\u2019m simply explaining why I\u2019m right.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- Please cancel my subscriptions to your issues.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- Some people are like clouds. When they disappear, it\u2019s a beautiful day.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- As your best friend I\u2019ll always pick you up when you fall, after I finish laughing.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- Love is blind; friendship tries not to notice. Otto von Bismarck<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- My esteem in this country has gone up substantially. It is very nice now that when people wave at me, they use all their fingers. Jimmy Carter (US president 1977 to 1981)<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. Mitch Hedberg<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- I have always wanted to be somebody<\/a>, but I see now I should have been more specific. Liliom Tomlin<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- I\u2019m writing a book. I\u2019ve got the page numbers done. Steven Wright<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people. Rodney Dangerfield<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio. Rodney Dangerfield<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- I just want my stomach to be as flat as my ass.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- I am not lazy. I am on energy saving mode.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- Sometimes I want to go back in time and punch myself in the face.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- I went to a meeting for premature ejaculators. I left early. Benny J\u00e1nos<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do. Unknown<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- If you are lonely, dim all lights and put on a horror movie. After a while it won\u2019t feel like you are alone anymore.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- I\u2019m not shy, I\u2019m holding back my awesomeness so I don\u2019t intimidate you.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- My life feels like a test I didn\u2019t study for.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- Everything happens for a reason. But sometimes the reason is that you\u2019re stupid and you make bad decisions.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- If we\u2019re not meant to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- A pessimist is a man who thinks everybody is as nasty as himself, and hates them for it. George Bernard Shaw<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- All generalizations are false, including this one<\/a>. Mark Twain<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive. Elbert Hubbard<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- Never miss a good chance to shut up. Will Rogers<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth. Anonymous.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- Don\u2019t be so humble \u2013 you are not that great. Golda Meir<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits. Albert Einstein<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me. Fred Allen<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee. Abraham Lincoln<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- It\u2019s okay if you don\u2019t like me. Not everyone has good taste.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- Accept who you are. Unless you\u2019re a serial killer. Ellen DeGeneres<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on. Winston S. Churchill<\/a><\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off. Bill Murray<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- If a book about failures doesn\u2019t sell, is it a success? Jerry Seinfeld<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company. Mark Twain<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- The best way to teach your kids about taxes is by eating 30 percent of their ice cream. Bill Murray<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- Tomorrow is often the busiest day of the week. Spanish proverb<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n
- B\u00f6lcs angol id\u00e9zetek az \u00e9letr\u0151l.<\/a><\/li>